Category: prayer

GodFAQs — Our New Sermon Series for August

prayer, Sermon, Uncategorized

GodFAQs — Our New Sermon Series for August

Sermon

Dear Pastors,
I’m exciting to announce that the new Sermon Series for August is “GodFAQs.” We are using the common internet term FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions) to draw people’s attention to frequently asked questions we have for God.

Sermon Titles are:
*Are You for Real?
*Do You Really Love Me?
*Is Jesus the Only Way to Heaven?
*Why Don’t You Answer My Prayers?
*What Happens When I Die?

If you are already a subscriber you can login @ https://www.sermonsubscription.com/login-1/

If you are not yet a subscriber, you can become one @ https://www.sermonsubscription.com/subscribe-here/
You will save big with the Annual Subscription!

Also, when you subscribe today, you will also get the July sermons at no cost!!

CHECK OUT OUR NEW PODCAST AT: https://anchor.fm/pastorshelper

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Nine Stupid Things I Did as a Pastor

Pastoral Leadership, Personal Growth, prayer, Uncategorized

Nine Stupid Things I Did as a Pastor

Pastoral Leadership, Personal Growth

3981364314_d4b30cb739_bBy Thom Rainer

If you want to read the tale of a pastor who really did some dumb things, keep reading.

I served as pastor of four churches. It was only by the grace of God and the graciousness of the congregations that I was called and allowed to stay at those churches. I absolutely love the members of those four congregations, and I will forever be grateful to them and for them.

Frankly, I’m not sure I would give myself a passing grade as a pastor. I messed up quite a bit. I would do several things differently today. And as a point of full disclosure, my list of nine is not close to being exhaustive.

1. I neglected my prayer life and time in the Word too often. It sounds absolutely insane as I write it, but I got too busy for God. As a consequence, I operated out of my own insufficient power too many times.
2. I neglected my family too often. Paul wrote these words to Pastor Timothy: “If anyone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of God’s church?” (1 Timothy 3:5, HCSB). Ouch. So many times I communicated through my actions to my family that they were not as important as other church members.
3. I let the crisis of the moment overwhelm me. In doing so I did not trust in God to see me through the situation. And I did not have a longer-term perspective to understand that difficulties are only for a season.
4. I perceived most of my critics as my adversaries. Some of my critics actually had constructive input. Others were going through their own struggles, and I was a convenient target. I took criticisms personally instead of responding pastorally.
5. I competed with other churches. Shame on me. Too often I wanted my church to have a greater attendance than other churches in the area. I should have been praying for and working with those other church leaders more.
6. I neglected praying with my staff. My prayer time with my church staff was haphazard at best. The one thing we needed to do the most, we were doing the least. I was a terrible leader on that front.
7. I often worried about what others thought about me. My sole concern should have been how Christ-like I was. Too often I sought the approval of others rather than the blessings of God.
8. I often yielded to unreasonable requests and demands. Instead of spending my time doing those things that really mattered, I gave in too often to the “squeaky wheel.” I sacrificed the great in order to do the good.
9. I gave up too often. Due to frustration, exhaustion or, more often, lack of faith, I gave up on challenges too quickly. I am convinced I missed out on many victories when they were just around the corner.

Those are but a few of the stupid things I did as a pastor. Most of you can breathe a sigh of relief that I never served as your pastor.

So why I am writing these self-critical comments at this stage of my life? I pray that some of you may see something in your own lives and leadership that you can correct before it’s too late. God is able. God is willing.

I look forward to your comments.

ThomRainer

 

This article was originally published at ThomRainer.com on May 4, 2015. Thom S. Rainer serves as president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources. Among his greatest joys are his family: his wife Nellie Jo; three sons, Sam, Art, and Jess; and seven grandchildren. Dr. Rainer can be found on Twitter @ThomRainer and at facebook.com/Thom.S.Rainer.

15 comments

15 comments

  • Sherene D Smith
    May 13, 2015 at 9:30 am

    Thank you for sharing. We have start a new church and it has been challenging.. thank you again for sharing your wisdom so we can stay focused.

    Reply

  • Erick
    May 13, 2015 at 9:39 am

    Thanks for being transparent. I believe it’s part of the reason people are leaving the church today is there is not enough transparency from the pulpit.

    Reply

  • Genaro Martinez, Jr.
    May 13, 2015 at 9:54 am

    Thank you for sharing this, all I can say is I have found myself there many times too. Only the grace of God and the love of the people we serve is what gets us through… God bless!

    Reply

  • David
    May 13, 2015 at 10:01 am

    I could add, “I spent too much time being mad at the ones who WEREN’T there and not enough time appreciating the ones who WERE there.”

    Reply

  • Anthony
    May 13, 2015 at 11:47 am

    I’ve been pastoring now for over 10 yrs. and I still haven’t perfected it. I have found out though, that the word of God, will always prevail over any situation. Just stay with the word. I have felt rejection, experienced slander, been taken to court, you name it; but God, and His word has always brought me through. And for that, I am encouraged.
    Thanks for the post.

    Reply

  • Lawrence Kumi
    May 13, 2015 at 11:54 am

    Thanks for sharing. It will be very helpful to some of us lay ministers. Most grateful.

    Reply

  • Musa Mitekaro
    May 13, 2015 at 12:07 pm

    Dear Pastor Rainer
    Greetings from Africa. I have been so much blessed by your articles. Sharing your experiences is a great ministry. I am a pastor and administrator here in Africa, you have touched my life. God bless you, your family and ministry

    Reply

  • Deborah Yinka
    May 13, 2015 at 2:59 pm

    Thanks for sharing your downsides with others. I really appreciate the fact someone else goes thru these challenges in serving the Lord Jesus. I think I get how to serve better. God bless you

    Reply

  • KOFI APPIANING
    May 13, 2015 at 4:22 pm

    Thanks for sharing. This is a great lesson for all ministers and Christian leaders

    Reply

  • Dexter
    May 13, 2015 at 7:44 pm

    Thank you for sharing some of the stuggles, and I believe it will help somebody.

    Reply

  • Jean Jackson Luma
    May 13, 2015 at 9:40 pm

    Dear Pastor Rainer
    Greetings From Haitian Community ( Norwood Church of God in Massachusetts) .

    Thanks so much for sharing your experiences with us ,by today I will apply them in my ministry .

    May God bless you and your family

    Bishop Jean J Luma

    Reply

  • Dave Stevenson
    May 14, 2015 at 5:42 am

    Thanks, when I hear or see someone take a stand for being wrong, I know they are on their way to greatness. Show us oh Lord who we are and how to grow in you.

    Reply

  • Frank esilaba
    May 14, 2015 at 10:10 am

    Dear Pastor
    Thanks for sharing. This is a great lesson for all ministers and Christian leaders and especially me. I will use this in my service for Christ our Lord.

    God bless you, your family and Ministry,

    Bishop Frank Esilaba

    Reply

  • Ps Ray Terborg
    May 15, 2015 at 5:05 am

    Thank you pastor for sharing with us your experiences this counts for Every ps bishops this is an eye opener for every leader in THE churches today,
    Thank you

    Reply

  • Pst. Edith Wekesa
    May 18, 2015 at 2:22 am

    Thank you pastor greetings from Kenya and for sharing about yourself. It is great that one can admit their faults. it gives me strength to know that the struggles are for all of us, therefore we need to uplift each other as ministers of the word of God all the earth. Its encouraging to share and enable others avoid same mistakes.

    Reply

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15 Characteristics of Genuinely Friendly Churches

Church Change, prayer, Uncategorized, worship

15 Characteristics of Genuinely Friendly Churches

Church Change, church growth

As churches begin to regather for in-person services, some areas of guest friendliness will change, at least for the short-term. For example, for precautionary reasons we likely will not be giving guests physical gifts.

As I have consulted with churches over the years, I have assembled data on what I called GFCs, genuinely friendly churches. I set certain parameters for GFCs; then I attempted to measure the guest return rates for those churches. A guest return rate is simply the percentage of guests who will return to the church for at least a second visit.

Here is the simple but profound difference I found in GFCs and all other churches: A genuinely friendly church has a guest return rate six times greater than other churches.

Did you get that? If a church meets the guidelines to be a GFC, the probability of a guest returning is six times higher than all other churches! Sadly, only about one of twenty churches meets the criteria necessary to be a GFC.

When I began as a consultant, I had 10 criteria, and the church had to meet at least eight of those criteria to be a GFC. I have since expanded the list to 15, and require churches to meet 12 of the 15 to be a GFC. Here are the 15 characteristics of genuinely friendly churches:

  1. They are intentional about being friendly. Warmth and friendliness are clear values of these churches. They are articulated regularly. All organizations, including churches, naturally drift toward an inward focus unless they are otherwise intentional.
  2. The leaders model warmth, humility, and friendliness. The friendliness is not contrived or phony. These leaders have prayerfully become genuinely friendly men and women.
  3. The leaders are clear that genuine friendliness is more than a brief stand and greet time in a worship service. The efficacy of a stand and greet time has been debated extensively in a previously published article. Regardless of a church’s decision in this practice, leaders in GFCs were adamant that true hospitality and friendliness extends beyond a two-minute welcome time.
  4. GFCs utilize a secret guest at least twice a year. One small church of which I am aware budgets $100 a year for a secret guest. They pay the guest with a $50 gift card to come to the church and provide feedback on their experience. I call this process “looking in the mirror” because it gives the church a real opportunity to see itself as others do.
  5. GFCs had a guest friendly website. The website typically set the tone for a guest. If it did not have obvious information for a guest, such as worship times and addresses, the guest came to the church with a more negative disposition.
  6. The church has clear signage. Far too many churches lack this signage. They assume that everyone knows where everything is. First-time guests know nothing about the church or its different facilities.
  7. GFCs have a well-organized greeters’ ministry. They have greeters in the parking lot, greeters in the entrances, and greeters in other strategic locations inside. Many GFCs utilize newer members in this ministry.
  8. These churches have clear information places. It may be something as simple as a well-marked table manned by a member of the church. The signage points clearly to the information table, booth, or kiosk.
  9. GFCs have clean and neat buildings. It is amazing how much a clean facility adds to the positive mood of a guest. It is equally amazing how few churches pay attention to this issue.
  10. They have a guest feedback process. To the best of their ability, GFCs follow up with guests to get feedback on their experiences. They also encourage the guests to be open and frank in the feedback.
  11. The children’s area is clearly safe and sanitary. Don’t expect young parents to return if the church does not give clear attention to this matter.
  12. The majority of church members in GFCs are involved in the community. They thus exude genuine friendliness in the worship services because they are regularly connecting with non-church members other days of the week.
  13. Small groups are highly intentional about reaching people beyond their own groups. Thus when these group members are in a worship service, they are already accustomed to reaching out beyond those with whom they already have relationships.
  14. GFCs have new member classes that emphasize the responsibilities and expectations of church members. Members are thus more apt to look beyond their own preferences to serve others. That attitude shows up in the worship services.
  15. GFCs demonstrate an awareness of and sensitivity to COVID-19 concerns. This issue will likely be around for a while.

Give your church an honest evaluation of these 15 items. See if you can give an emphatic “yes” to at least 12 of them. If not, what should your church change?

 

This article was originally published at ChurchAnswers.com. Thom S. Rainer serves as founder and CEO of Church Answers. Dr. Rainer publishes a daily blog and podcast at ChurchAnswers.com and can be found on Twitter @ThomRainer and at facebook.com/Thom.S.Rainer.

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Nine Stupid Things I Did as a Pastor

Pastoral Leadership, Personal Growth, prayer, Uncategorized

Nine Stupid Things I Did as a Pastor

Pastoral Leadership, Personal Growth

3981364314_d4b30cb739_bBy Thom Rainer

If you want to read the tale of a pastor who really did some dumb things, keep reading.

I served as pastor of four churches. It was only by the grace of God and the graciousness of the congregations that I was called and allowed to stay at those churches. I absolutely love the members of those four congregations, and I will forever be grateful to them and for them.

Frankly, I’m not sure I would give myself a passing grade as a pastor. I messed up quite a bit. I would do several things differently today. And as a point of full disclosure, my list of nine is not close to being exhaustive.

1. I neglected my prayer life and time in the Word too often. It sounds absolutely insane as I write it, but I got too busy for God. As a consequence, I operated out of my own insufficient power too many times.
2. I neglected my family too often. Paul wrote these words to Pastor Timothy: “If anyone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of God’s church?” (1 Timothy 3:5, HCSB). Ouch. So many times I communicated through my actions to my family that they were not as important as other church members.
3. I let the crisis of the moment overwhelm me. In doing so I did not trust in God to see me through the situation. And I did not have a longer-term perspective to understand that difficulties are only for a season.
4. I perceived most of my critics as my adversaries. Some of my critics actually had constructive input. Others were going through their own struggles, and I was a convenient target. I took criticisms personally instead of responding pastorally.
5. I competed with other churches. Shame on me. Too often I wanted my church to have a greater attendance than other churches in the area. I should have been praying for and working with those other church leaders more.
6. I neglected praying with my staff. My prayer time with my church staff was haphazard at best. The one thing we needed to do the most, we were doing the least. I was a terrible leader on that front.
7. I often worried about what others thought about me. My sole concern should have been how Christ-like I was. Too often I sought the approval of others rather than the blessings of God.
8. I often yielded to unreasonable requests and demands. Instead of spending my time doing those things that really mattered, I gave in too often to the “squeaky wheel.” I sacrificed the great in order to do the good.
9. I gave up too often. Due to frustration, exhaustion or, more often, lack of faith, I gave up on challenges too quickly. I am convinced I missed out on many victories when they were just around the corner.

Those are but a few of the stupid things I did as a pastor. Most of you can breathe a sigh of relief that I never served as your pastor.

So why I am writing these self-critical comments at this stage of my life? I pray that some of you may see something in your own lives and leadership that you can correct before it’s too late. God is able. God is willing.

I look forward to your comments.

ThomRainer

 

This article was originally published at ThomRainer.com on May 4, 2015. Thom S. Rainer serves as president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources. Among his greatest joys are his family: his wife Nellie Jo; three sons, Sam, Art, and Jess; and seven grandchildren. Dr. Rainer can be found on Twitter @ThomRainer and at facebook.com/Thom.S.Rainer.

15 comments

15 comments

  • Sherene D Smith
    May 13, 2015 at 9:30 am

    Thank you for sharing. We have start a new church and it has been challenging.. thank you again for sharing your wisdom so we can stay focused.

    Reply

  • Erick
    May 13, 2015 at 9:39 am

    Thanks for being transparent. I believe it’s part of the reason people are leaving the church today is there is not enough transparency from the pulpit.

    Reply

  • Genaro Martinez, Jr.
    May 13, 2015 at 9:54 am

    Thank you for sharing this, all I can say is I have found myself there many times too. Only the grace of God and the love of the people we serve is what gets us through… God bless!

    Reply

  • David
    May 13, 2015 at 10:01 am

    I could add, “I spent too much time being mad at the ones who WEREN’T there and not enough time appreciating the ones who WERE there.”

    Reply

  • Anthony
    May 13, 2015 at 11:47 am

    I’ve been pastoring now for over 10 yrs. and I still haven’t perfected it. I have found out though, that the word of God, will always prevail over any situation. Just stay with the word. I have felt rejection, experienced slander, been taken to court, you name it; but God, and His word has always brought me through. And for that, I am encouraged.
    Thanks for the post.

    Reply

  • Lawrence Kumi
    May 13, 2015 at 11:54 am

    Thanks for sharing. It will be very helpful to some of us lay ministers. Most grateful.

    Reply

  • Musa Mitekaro
    May 13, 2015 at 12:07 pm

    Dear Pastor Rainer
    Greetings from Africa. I have been so much blessed by your articles. Sharing your experiences is a great ministry. I am a pastor and administrator here in Africa, you have touched my life. God bless you, your family and ministry

    Reply

  • Deborah Yinka
    May 13, 2015 at 2:59 pm

    Thanks for sharing your downsides with others. I really appreciate the fact someone else goes thru these challenges in serving the Lord Jesus. I think I get how to serve better. God bless you

    Reply

  • KOFI APPIANING
    May 13, 2015 at 4:22 pm

    Thanks for sharing. This is a great lesson for all ministers and Christian leaders

    Reply

  • Dexter
    May 13, 2015 at 7:44 pm

    Thank you for sharing some of the stuggles, and I believe it will help somebody.

    Reply

  • Jean Jackson Luma
    May 13, 2015 at 9:40 pm

    Dear Pastor Rainer
    Greetings From Haitian Community ( Norwood Church of God in Massachusetts) .

    Thanks so much for sharing your experiences with us ,by today I will apply them in my ministry .

    May God bless you and your family

    Bishop Jean J Luma

    Reply

  • Dave Stevenson
    May 14, 2015 at 5:42 am

    Thanks, when I hear or see someone take a stand for being wrong, I know they are on their way to greatness. Show us oh Lord who we are and how to grow in you.

    Reply

  • Frank esilaba
    May 14, 2015 at 10:10 am

    Dear Pastor
    Thanks for sharing. This is a great lesson for all ministers and Christian leaders and especially me. I will use this in my service for Christ our Lord.

    God bless you, your family and Ministry,

    Bishop Frank Esilaba

    Reply

  • Ps Ray Terborg
    May 15, 2015 at 5:05 am

    Thank you pastor for sharing with us your experiences this counts for Every ps bishops this is an eye opener for every leader in THE churches today,
    Thank you

    Reply

  • Pst. Edith Wekesa
    May 18, 2015 at 2:22 am

    Thank you pastor greetings from Kenya and for sharing about yourself. It is great that one can admit their faults. it gives me strength to know that the struggles are for all of us, therefore we need to uplift each other as ministers of the word of God all the earth. Its encouraging to share and enable others avoid same mistakes.

    Reply

Leave a comment

Pastor, How Well Do You Know Jesus?

Personal Growth, prayer, Sermon, Uncategorized

Pastor, How Well Do You Know Jesus?

Personal Growth

knowing-jesus

When you are in ministry, people just assume that you have a very strong relationship with Jesus. And they should be able to assume that, but unfortunately, it is an assumption that doesn’t always turn out to be true. In my ministry I get to talk to a lot of pastors, and truth be told, many of them know a lot of facts about Jesus, but for any number of reasons, they don’t have a close personal relationship with Him anymore. Here are some common reasons:

  1. Not enough time with the Word. It is one thing to read the Bible to get together a sermon outline or lesson, it is quite another to read the Bible devotionally for the sole purpose of drawing closer to Jesus.
  2. Not enough time in Prayer. Sometimes we are in such a big hurry that the only prayers we offer are before meals and from the pulpit.
  3. Not enough Faith. You might be shocked to learn how many ministers struggle with their faith on a day-to-day basis. It isn’t that they are atheists, but they’ve come to a point in their spiritual journey where they just have trouble believing like they once did.
  4. Not enough Motivation. Sometimes after working 50-70 hours a week in ministry, you are so spent trying to be Jesus to others, that you have no drive to spend time with the real Jesus yourself.
  5. Not enough Concern. Unfortunately, there are a number of ministers who just don’t care about knowing Jesus at any more depth than they know Him now.

The words above aren’t written to condemn, but to recognize some of the behaviors that have led us away from knowing Jesus as we should. I am convinced that we all would rather experience what John shared:

That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked upon, and our hands have handled, concerning the Word of life–the life was manifested, and we have seen, and bear witness, and declare to you that eternal life which was with the Father and was manifested to us–that which we have seen and heard we declare to you, that you also may have fellowship with us; and truly our fellowship is with the Father and with His Son Jesus Christ. — 1 John 1:1-3 (NKJV)

It’s hard not to envy John as we read these words. He begins this letter by identifying himself as one who had experienced an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. How wonderful to consider what it must have been like to hear, see, and touch the one who has always been. If we use our imaginations, we can perhaps obtain a small glimpse of what John was able to see firsthand so many years ago.

But you and I both know that seeing Jesus with our eyes is not what we need the most, even though it would make us feel good on an emotional level. What is most important is that we recognize Jesus as John describes Him, as “the Word of life.”  This is the same way John started out his Gospel account – “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.” (John 1:1, NKJV). This Word John speaks of is the eternal, infallible, sinless, crucified, risen, and returning Son of the living God. And the great news is that today, even as you read these words, THE Word wants nothing more than for you to grow in relationship with Him. Are you ready?

How can you begin to know Jesus again on a personal level? How about reversing the negatives above, and turning them into positives?

  1. Spend time in the Word! Starting right now, open your Bible and begin reading one of the Gospels and discover all over again why you are in love with Jesus. Don’t stop to take notes! Don’t try to find a sermon outline in the text! Just read it and take the time to ponder how great Jesus is.
  2. Start Praying! Jesus wants to hear your voice right now. You don’t have to come up with something flowery or something that sounds like an institutional prayer. Just lay your heart out to Jesus like you once did. Let Him know your fears, your doubts, your frustrations, but also let Him know that He can count on you to continue fighting for Him and His Kingdom!
  3. Begin Building Your Faith! Remember all the ways that God has worked in your life in the past. Ponder all the times you’ve seen Him work in the lives of others. Look up into the sky and fathom the wonderful universe that He has created. What brought you to faith in the first place? Reflect on that and begin to focus on it all over again.
  4. Recharge Your Battery! I know what it is like to work long hours, struggling to be everything everyone thinks you should be. It is exhausting! You are going to have to take time off for yourself. Hopefully you are taking at least one day a week where you are not focusing on ministry at all. Read a book, go for a walk, talk to your spouse! Allow yourself a break from the everyday stress of ministry.
  5. Reignite Your Passion! You know deep down that without an intimate relationship with Jesus, your life is just going to keep getting worse. Depression, burnout, marital problems, and much more, often take place when we lose our passion for Jesus and the ministry He has called us to. All of what has been stated above will help you to get your passion back, but there is one more thing that will help — surrender your life to Him all over again. I’m not talking about being “resaved,” but recommitting yourself to Jesus and your calling. When you recommit you refocus, and when you refocus, your passion will return.

So Pastor, how well do you know Jesus? I hope that starting today, you’ll take the steps necessary to know Him better than you ever have before!

Now please do me a favor — click the “Read More” button directly below this message and then go down to where it says “Leave A Reply” and let me know if this article helped you today. Feel free to share with us and other pastors who will read this, how God is helping you to get to know Him better. Also, please click on the social media buttons and share this on Facebook, Twitter, etc… to help get the word out! We truly want to be the “Pastor’s Helper.”

In Christ,

Barry L. Davis

 

 

 

Barry

50 comments , , ,

50 comments

  • Tony Myers
    February 27, 2014 at 8:44 am

    A very good word, and a great reminder. I’m no good to others, without a continual renewel of my personel relationship with Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit!

    Reply

    • Timothy
      February 27, 2014 at 7:45 pm

      Thanks! I think this was just for me because I had lost my passion last month so this is a big help.

      Reply

    • JoAnn Marie
      March 1, 2014 at 10:38 am

      thank you for that inspiration . it is amazing how God will use someone anything to speak to your heart. I love God the father God the son , and God the holy spirit and the spouse of the Holy spirit every morning when i rise i thank the holy trinity i recognize my higher powers someone is watching me maybe an audience of unseen world is watching over me and wishing me well in Jesus name i pray

      Reply

    • Sylvester N. Yaingbaye
      March 14, 2014 at 4:19 am

      Good reminder to retrospect our lives and stage a revival that begins within ourselves.

      Reply

  • Dale Hunt
    February 27, 2014 at 8:51 am

    Thanks Barry! As always, encouraging & challenging thoughts. God bless!

    Reply

  • Levie Taylor
    February 27, 2014 at 8:54 am

    Excellent article that caused me to reflect on the level of true intimacy I have with Christ. I will share with others.

    Reply

  • Walter Monroe
    February 27, 2014 at 8:56 am

    Thank you for sharing this with me today. This is very helpful in that it help me in thinking through some of the hard things that I go through as a retired pastor. Barry, I think you hit the nail right on the head in what you are saying. Thank you for sharing this with me today.

    Reply

  • Frank
    February 27, 2014 at 8:58 am

    Thank you for this very insightful article. Continue your good work.

    Reply

  • Pastor Sandy
    February 27, 2014 at 9:07 am

    Thank you — needed to read this— so how true it is we don’t give enough time to renewel my personel relationship with Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit!
    Keep the good WORD and encouragement coming…
    > We all need it –<

    Reply

  • Don
    February 27, 2014 at 9:09 am

    I’ve been a pastor for over 35 years and am especially guilty of #4, once going a 10 year stretch w/o using any of my vacation time. I now am mentoring 3 young pastors to be & have been telling them some of the “dumb things I have done”. I will share this article w/ them in a meeting this morning.

    Reply

  • Ivan
    February 27, 2014 at 9:12 am

    Thank you so much for this message, it has touched my heart.

    Reply

  • Ernesto
    February 27, 2014 at 9:20 am

    “When you recommit you refocus, and when you refocus, your passion will return.” This really helped!! Thanks so much!

    Reply

  • Ch perry
    February 27, 2014 at 9:26 am

    Good and needed message to us all.

    Reply

  • Pastor Rick Bee
    February 27, 2014 at 9:29 am

    Brother Barry;Thank you for this short message. You are right others look to me to be a guiding light, so to speak. My relationship with the father, I want to be stronger each day, more than the day before. God bless you brother, in the name of our Lord.

    Reply

  • Pastor Ron
    February 27, 2014 at 9:38 am

    Thanks for the message. Can anyone help with a Liturgy for the Thursday of Holy Week? I have been asked to join in a Social Meal but also to incorporate Holy Communion into it. The idea appeals of gathering around a real meal and really talking to people as opposed to the more familiar liturgical Communion and “standard type” address I usually preside at. Any suggestions?

    Reply

  • Pastor Goddy
    February 27, 2014 at 9:40 am

    Thanks a great deal.Helpful my brother.Sometimes I feel like am not doing enough ‘knowing Him’

    Reply

  • Pastor Charles A. Floyd, II, B.A, B. Sc.
    February 27, 2014 at 10:08 am

    Great article Dr. Davis, Thoughtful and needed commentary.

    Reply

  • raymond kyi win
    February 27, 2014 at 10:32 am

    thank you pastor. hoping more advises from you. god bless.

    Reply

  • Larry
    February 27, 2014 at 10:36 am

    Brother Barry : very pertinent message those very same things were touching my life and ministry just this week. I went to The Lord with fasting and prayer and feel connected and in tune again. Thanks for all your Kingdom work. We need men like you to bring things out in the open that we all experience along the way.

    Reply

  • Dale Strand
    February 27, 2014 at 10:42 am

    “That I may know Him — and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings — being made conformable unto his death.” Phil. 3:10

    It’s all about falling in love with Jesus all over again…

    Blessings and favor to you, Dr. B, for this powerful and anointed Word today❗️

    Reply

  • Allan RIver
    February 27, 2014 at 10:57 am

    I found this to be very helpful and thoughts to ponder on, in fact to reflect upon my spiritual life and as said, my relationship with Jesus. There’s always more we can doto live closer with Jesus, that special relationship where I can talk to Him even whilst I’m standing in a que or during my lunchtime at work.

    Reply

  • Major Lorne Hiscock
    February 27, 2014 at 11:20 am

    Pastor Barry thank you for that thought provoking question. AS I grow older in the faith of Jesus Christ I am reminded every day how much I need to know Jesus more. There is an old hymn, which by the way is not sung too much anymore which say’s, “More, more about Jesus, More of His saving truth proclaim. More of His love who died for me” It means becoming richer and fuller in His love. Hallelujah what a Saviour. God bless you brother Barry keep it coming.

    Reply

  • Rev. Shirlie Watson
    February 27, 2014 at 12:13 pm

    thanks so much for this today. I needed this encouragement. Having gone thru recent surgery, recuperating time has been helpful to gain insight and encouragement from others.
    Today was much needed and accepted!

    Reply

  • Bishop Fredrick Ogara
    February 27, 2014 at 1:41 pm

    Dear Brother Barry,
    I want thank you so much for revitalizing my spirit and my inner being.

    God bless you

    Reply

  • Isaac Gearring
    February 27, 2014 at 2:47 pm

    Thank you so much Dr. Barry for a most needed and very inspiring Word. God blessings to you and your ministry forever more!

    Reply

  • Iphie Agwu
    February 27, 2014 at 5:04 pm

    Thanks so much for this reminder, it is very timely especially at this time when the second coming of our LORD is very near. GOD bless u.

    Reply

  • Atepera Lee
    February 27, 2014 at 5:09 pm

    Thanks Barry-I totally agree of what you have said about us ministers including myself and our real relationship with Jesus. My second wife whom we married about a year ago is very keen in having quite time with Lord every morning. That’s an encouragement for me to recommit and refocus to get closer to Him. Thanks again for reminding us. God bless. I am a pastor of the Samoan community church (congregational)in Sydney

    Reply

  • Minister Greene
    February 27, 2014 at 10:51 pm

    I am a Minister who is at the point on going to the next level in my spiritual life. I have been praying asking God for His guidance in going into full time ministry. You message have given me a clear insight on my next endeavor with Christ. God bless

    Reply

  • Shipalana Evans
    February 27, 2014 at 11:20 pm

    This is really for me! You just talked to my life! My battery needed recharged after I have gone through a lot in ministry!

    Reply

  • Francis
    February 27, 2014 at 11:53 pm

    This is a good message of the times we are living in

    Reply

  • Punnie Quarshie
    February 28, 2014 at 1:25 am

    This is a good reminder. As a minister sometines i find myself reading for a message rather than for myself.

    Thanks and God bless you

    Reply

  • Abednego Boye
    February 28, 2014 at 5:09 am

    Thanks for this inspirational words. I really need to refocus and rededicate my my life to Jesus . I lost my church and now am jobless which has made me miserable.
    I need prayers. Thanks.

    Reply

  • REV S.NAYAGAM
    February 28, 2014 at 8:20 am

    Dear pastor thank you the encouragement, this is a good reminder. As a pastor sometimes I find myself reading for a message rather than for myself.
    Thanks and God bless you
    GOD blesses you!

    With regards
    REV S.NAYAGAM
    NO 120 P&T COLONY VENKATESHPURAM
    Arabic college post
    BANGALORE-560045
    PHONE NO 91-80-25478286 CELL—7204488112, TELE FAX-91-80-25478286

    Reply

  • Sylvester Adams
    February 28, 2014 at 8:37 am

    It’s amazing man of God. Those first two indispensable requirements definitely lead to the rest you’ve mentioned sir. Am reminded, am rekindled. The God of eternity bless you abundantly in Jesus honored Name. HALLELUJAH

    Reply

  • Osho Segun
    March 1, 2014 at 2:25 am

    Very correct and timely. Ministry is full of risks. sometime, as ministers, we work under assumptions.if care is not taken we might have been deflated spiritually before we know.may God help us as we also help .we need to focus on matters that matter.

    Reply

  • S Bethel
    March 1, 2014 at 1:37 pm

    Blessings and thanks for the reminder and kind words of helping to keep me focused on the right things in the midst of all business. May God continue to be our constant priority over everything else.

    Reply

  • Bro. Terry Holmes
    March 1, 2014 at 9:47 pm

    Thanks so much Dr. Barry! I really needed this.

    Reply

  • Bro. Terry Holmes
    March 1, 2014 at 10:00 pm

    This is a very good article. You should put it on ministersmeetup too. It really spoke to me. Thanks again.

    Reply

  • Darlene Fish
    March 2, 2014 at 8:25 am

    This is very true. WAS VERY HELPFUL THANK YOU

    Reply

  • Mike
    March 3, 2014 at 2:45 am

    Thanks. Helpful article.

    Reply

  • Mike Murray
    March 4, 2014 at 3:54 am

    Dear Barry:

    God bless you for writing this article. It’s good for all of us to be reminded Whose we are.

    If Jesus isn’t real to us, we can’t make him real to our congregations.

    Thanks for blessing us.

    Because He Lives!
    Mike

    Reply

  • Orlando Holloway
    March 4, 2014 at 12:55 pm

    Thanks Barry for the reminder that we need to constantly refocus our attention on our Lord. It never cease to amaze me how God takes care of his children even when we have gone stale.Your article ignited a need in my spirit to get back to the old pattern of a daily walk with the risen Christ so that I am energized by the washing and renewing by the word.It is so simple but so often neglected and if neglected so draining.Thanks for the gentle reminder. I will start NOW. Thank you for your loving challenge.God bless you in ministry.
    Orlando

    Reply

  • Marlene Brown
    March 5, 2014 at 2:24 pm

    Thank you Barry for your question. I needed to read those questions and stop and realize how much I need time by myself to sit at the feet of Jesus and just rest in Him. My life right now is stressed because of a family situation with our two adult sons who have mental illness. They are both going through a crisis right now. One has a drug problem which has been on going for a while. The other one has just come out of his marriage in the last two years.
    I am blessed with a wonderful church family who prays and loves each other and stands in the gap. I know that God is with us and keeps us strong through the battles. I do love my Lord so much but it’s been hard at times to get the quiet time that I need. Thanks again God Bless.

    Reply

  • Atepera Lee
    March 6, 2014 at 2:30 am

    Dear Dr.Davies
    Your question, how well my relationship is with Jesus. I will try to answer it the best I can.Reading your five point suggestions and making them positive is the way to do it. Some of those points like prayer, faith,motivation are still being practice. And the others are also practiced but to a lesser extend. The fact is, as I am getting older,body got weak with disease,I become lazy-but thank God for my wife who is strong in faith that motivates me to move forward. We ask for your prayers to know Him well. Blessing-Atepera

    Reply

  • munokoa dean
    March 7, 2014 at 3:24 pm

    Kia akameitaki ia koe e Barry, na te Atua e tauturu mai ia koe e taau e rave nei no tona anoano.

    Thank you very much Barry, God bless you and your wonderful Ministry.

    Kia manuia/Kindest Regards
    Rev Munokoa Dean

    Reply

  • lilika
    March 10, 2014 at 8:06 pm

    Thank you very much Barry, this reminds me that the relationship with the Father and the Son is the most important thing. This reminds me that we cannot have faith without this relationship.

    Reply

  • Salimoni Karusi
    April 16, 2014 at 1:25 am

    Thank you so much for the need to enhance my relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ. I am on my way to help not only my life with Jesus Christ but share the same with other brother pastors in my country.

    Reply

  • Salimoni Karusi
    April 16, 2014 at 1:48 am

    Thank you so much. Yes I need to enlarge and deepen my personal relationship with the
    Lord Jesus Christ and to also encourage other Pastors. May God continue to bless your Ministry.

    Reply

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Seven Ways to Deal with CAVE Dwellers in Your Church

Difficult Issues, Pastoral Leadership, Personal Growth, prayer, Uncategorized

Seven Ways to Deal with CAVE Dwellers in Your Church

Difficult Issues, Pastoral Leadership, Personal Growth

3592_153064459460bbce728abf

By Thom Rainer

They are in every church. They are critics. They are naysayers. If your church has regular business meetings, they will be the negatively outspoken people.

They often begin sentences with “I love you pastor, but . . .” And the moment you hear “but,” you cringe. You wait for the verbal assault.

Critics and naysayers are in every church. They are CAVE (Consistently Against Virtually Everything) Dwellers (This phrase originated with Curt Coffman in his work on disen-
gaged employees.). They can make your life miserable . . . unless you learn to deal with them.

I am not the best role model for dealing with CAVE dwellers. When I was a pastor, I struggled with critics and naysayers. I still do. So I asked some church leaders who, in my opinion, have a very healthy approach to these people. Here are seven things I learned from them.

  1. Accept the reality that every church and organization will have CAVE dwellers. You will deal with them in a more healthy fashion if you are not blindsided by them. And you will realize than the green grass of other churches may be a bit brown.
  2. Pray for your own attitude. I am glad Jesus did not hold my sins against me through his death on the cross. My attitude should be like His, and I should seek prayerfully to have the right attitude toward CAVE dwellers.
  3. Pray for the CAVE dwellers. Even if you consider them your enemy, we are supposed to pray for our enemies. Sometimes I have to ask God to give me the grace to pray for these people because they have hurt me so much.
  4. Stay above reproach. Don’t stoop to the negative, gossiping, bickering, and deceitful level of CAVE dwellers. Pray that God will give you the strength, wisdom, and grace to live above such attitudes and actions.
  5. Spend more time with positive church members. CAVE dwellers can be the squeaky wheels that demand constant oiling. If you spend too much time with these members, you will become emotionally and spiritually drained. Be intentional about spending time with church members who energize and encourage you.
  6. Spend more time with church leaders in other churches. You will develop invaluable friendships and camaraderie. And you will soon discover you are not alone with these issues.
  7. Ask other members to help you deal with CAVE dwellers. I recently heard from a pastor who did just that. He was shocked to find more than one encouraging church leader willing and ready to help him deal with these people. The comment from one of these positive members hit home: “Pastor, we did not know you were having to deal with these issues. We wish you had told us sooner.”

Yes, you will always have people in your church who seem to be consistently against virtually everything. They are emotionally draining. They are discouraging. And they never really go away.

Our challenge, in God’s power, is to deal with CAVE dwellers in the most positive and God-honoring way we can. So, how do you deal with CAVE dwellers? What would you add to the seven ways I noted above? Let me hear from you.

 

This article was originally published at ThomRainer.com on November 17, 2014. Thom S. Rainer serves as president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources. Among his greatest joys are his family: his wife Nellie Jo; three sons, Sam,  Art, and Jess; and seven grandchildren. Dr. Rainer can be found on Twitter @ThomRainer and at facebook.com/Thom.S.Rainer.

4 comments

4 comments

  • linda newman
    November 19, 2014 at 11:13 am

    You could also think about approaching them and making them allies; many may be left-brained analyticals whose first response to an issue is to take it apart and find potential issues to reduce risk, and they are motivated by their love for the church just as the pastor is. They may have been there, done that, have the t-shirt, and may have words of wisdom. Consult with them in advance, get their perspective, and use it or not, but if they feel heard, the comments in the meeting may go away. (I’m the worst of all possible combinations of this, a lawyer who has been a 35+ year member, been a member of every committee, and a compliance officer as part of my day job. I recognize that my analytical nature is not an inspirational gift, but it is a gift that can help anticipate problems. I show up to do the “dirty work” too, teaching sunday school, singing in the choir, cleaning up after fellowship luncheons.

    Reply

  • Chris Holden
    November 19, 2014 at 6:06 pm

    Dear Linda Newman. Thank you so much for your comment and perspective, I too am a left- brained analytical , very much a member of the body of Christ. Yes I have learnt to temper my “Ah but….in committee meetings, but so much is achieved and runs smoothly in church because of it. Wrongly used all I did in my younger days was to stifle vision now I help dreams and vision become reality. I see all the problems 6 months before anyone else and within seconds of the idea being voiced, but with Gods help it becomes strategic thinking and facilitating , making others look good- Glory to God for all the gifts within the Body –

    Reply

  • Floyd Knight
    November 22, 2014 at 6:07 pm

    A board meeting is NEVER the time for analysis or nay-saying. The chair should control the floor and have people speak to the issue or recommendation. So called “left brain” folks should volunteer for the committee or working group which will explore and consider the issue or purchase or programmatic action. The leadership should then distribute the proposal/recommendation and the “summary” document notating the methods and/or procedures used to come to a decision or recommendation–including pros and cons. Questions regarding the same by “left brainers” who have failed to read the document before the committee meeting should be cut short and referred to the section of the document. IF they want to make comments, they should be required to specify the page and section of the summary document or recommendation. They shouldn’t take up the church board’s time and should voluntarily refrain from voting on the recommendation since they didn’t read the same before the meeting.
    |——On the other hand, if recommendations and proposals come to the board without written justification and rationalization, then such proposals should be withdrawn and referred to committee or tabled. Individual responses, personal statements and proposals should also be stopped. The person should be referred to the proper committee, workgroup, or person. Such comments should not be tolerated from the floor–especially if you are following parliamentary procedures. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD CRITICAL ANALYSES AND REVIEWS TAKE PLACE DURING A CHURCH BOARD MEETING;otherwise, you are running an effective board.

    Reply

  • Floyd Knight
    November 22, 2014 at 6:11 pm

    THE LAST SENTENCE SHOULD HAVE READ:

    UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD CRITICAL “AD LIB,” “SPONTANEOUS,” OR UNWRITTEN ANALYSES AND REVIEWS TAKE PLACE DURING A CHURCH BOARD MEETING;otherwise, you are not running an effective board meeting.

    Reply

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SERMON SERIES NOW AVAILABLE FOR IMMEDIATE DOWNLOAD

Church Change, prayer, Sermon, Uncategorized

SERMON SERIES NOW AVAILABLE FOR IMMEDIATE DOWNLOAD

Sermon

We have had more requests to make past sermon series available from our Subscription Series than any other resource. It has taken us awhile to get it all together, but the following Sermons are now available for Immediate Download at:

http://sermonsubscription.com/purchase-previous-series-here/

SERMON SERIES — GETTING BACK TO THE BIBLE

Sermon #1 — The Bible is a Tool for You to Use
Sermon #2 — The Bible is a Gift from God to You
Sermon #3 — The Bible Will Change Your Life

SERMON SERIES — CHURCH AS GOD INTENDED

Sermon #1 — The Design of the Church
Sermon #2 — The Structure of the Church
Sermon #3 — The Arithmetic of the Church
Sermon #4 — The Membership of the Church

SERMON SERIES — A BRAND NEW YOU

Sermon #1 — Renewed by the Spirit
Sermon #2 — Renewed by our Vision
Sermon #3 — Renewed by our Thinking

SERMON SERIES — A LIFE THAT LASTS FOREVER

Sermon #1 — The Source of Eternal Life
Sermon #2 — The Possession of Eternal Life
Sermon #3 — The Fullness of Eternal Life
Sermon #4 — The Power of Eternal Life

SERMON SERIES — ABUNDANTLY MORE

Sermon #1 — God is Able
Sermon #2 — The Power at Work
Sermon #3 — For God’s Glory
Sermon #4 — Throughout All Generations

SERMON SERIES — BIBLE 3:16s

Sermon #1 — John 3:16
Sermon #2 — Ephesians 3:16
Sermon #3 — Colossians 3:16
Sermon #4 — 1 Timothy 3:16
Sermon #5 — 1 John 3:16

SERMON SERIES — DISCOVERING MY IDENTITY IN CHRIST

Sermon #1 — I Am Secure
Sermon #2 — I Am Free from Condemnation
Sermon #3 — I Am God’s Temple
Sermon #4 — I Am God’s Anointed
Sermon #5 — I Am a Citizen of Heaven

SERMON SERIES — FINDING GOD IN THE PSALMS

Sermon #1 — God Brings Us Joy
Sermon #2 — God Shepherds Us
Sermon #3 — God Counsels Us
Sermon #4 — God Leads Us

SERMON SERIES — FOUR LETTER WORDS

Sermon #1 — Lost
Sermon #2 — Obey
Sermon #3 — Holy
Sermon #4 — Hell
Sermon #5 — Fear

SERMON SERIES — GATHERING THE HARVEST

Sermon #1 — Dedicated to Compassion
Sermon #2 — Developed by Right Thinking
Sermon #3 — Driven by a Bold Spirit

SERMON SERIES — GOD IS FAITHFUL

Sermon #1 — Faithful in Caring for Us
Sermon #2 — Faithful in Our Trials
Sermon #3 — Faithful in Our Temptations
Sermon #4 — Faithful to His Promises

SERMON SERIES — HELPFUL TRUTHS FROM HEBREWS

Sermon #1 — The Need for Blood
Sermon #2 — The Need for Faith
Sermon #3 — The Need for Holiness
Sermon #4 — The Need for Discipline

SERMON SERIES — HOW DID THEY DO IT? (Book of Acts)

Sermon #1 — They Lived in Expectancy
Sermon #2 — They Focused on Fellowship
Sermon #3 — They Cultivated Courage
Sermon #4 — They Emphasized Outreach

SERMON SERIES — IT’S ALL ABOUT JESUS

Sermon #1 — Jesus: Our Example
Sermon #2 — Jesus: Our Power
Sermon #3 — Jesus: Our Ransom
Sermon #4 — Jesus: Our Coming One

SERMON SERIES — LIGHT IT UP

Sermon #1 — Receive It
Sermon #2 — Live It
Sermon #3 — Share It

SERMON SERIES — LIVING LIKE JESUS

Sermon #1 — What Do We Need to Change to Live Like Jesus?
Sermon #2 — With Jesus in the Desert
Sermon #3 — With Jesus in the Community
Sermon #4 — With Jesus, Touching the Untouchable
Sermon #5 — We Can Do It!

SERMON SERIES — LIVING THE FAITH-LIFE (Book of James)

Sermon #1 — Faith Under Pressure
Sermon #2 — Faith In Action
Sermon #3 — Faith Under Control
Sermon #4 — Faith that Submits
Sermon #5 — Faith that Prays

SERMON SERIES — MODERN FAMILY

Sermon #1 — A Family with Purpose
Sermon #2 — A Family in Peace
Sermon #3 — A Family in Process
Sermon #4 — A Family in Recovery

SERMON SERIES — RIGHTEOUS ROAD SIGNS

Sermon #1 — U-Turn
Sermon #2 — Yield
Sermon #3 — Curve Ahead

SERMON SERIES — SOLID ANSWERS TO SEARCHING QUESTIONS

Sermon #1 — Why Does God Allow Suffering?
Sermon #2 — How Do I Know I Can Trust the Bible?
Sermon #3 — Is It Wrong to Live a Homosexual Lifestyle?
Sermon #4 — What Am I Supposed to Do When Life Knocks Me Down?

SERMON SERIES — STARTING OVER

Sermon #1 — I’m Going to Set My Priorities
Sermon #2 — I’m Going to Follow Jesus
Sermon #3 — I’m Going to Discover My Purpose
Sermon #4 — I’m Going to Focus on Relationships

SERMON SERIES — TAKE OFF YOUR MASK

Sermon #1 — Dealing With Conflict
Sermon #2 — Controlling the Chaos
Sermon #3 — Bringing Light to Darkness
Sermon #4 — Valuing What Matters

SERMON SERIES — THE DEMANDS OF DISCIPLESHIP

Sermon #1 — A Cross
Sermon #2 — A Towel
Sermon #3 — A Yoke
Sermon #4 — A Mission

SERMON SERIES — THE MINISTRY OF THE HOLY SPIRIT

Sermon #1 — The Spirit’s Testimony
Sermon #2 — The Spirit’s Power
Sermon #3 — The Spirit’s Work
Sermon #4 — The Spirit’s Filling

SERMON SERIES — THE POWER OF ONE

Sermon #1 — The Power of One Person
Sermon #2 — The Power of One Prayer
Sermon #3 — The Power of One Invitation
Sermon #4 — The Power of One Vision

SERMON SERIES — WHAT I NEED NOW

Sermon #1 — A God Who Loves Me
Sermon #2 — A God Who Transforms Me
Sermon #3 — A God Who Assures Me

SERMON SERIES — WHAT JESUS SAYS ABOUT YOU

Sermon #1 — You are the Salt of the Earth
Sermon #2 — You are the Light of the World
Sermon #3 — You are Not Alarmed
Sermon #4 — You are Blessed by the Father

SERMON SERIES — WHAT KIND OF CHURCH IS THIS?

Sermon #1 — A Church that Includes You
Sermon #2 — A Church that Instructs You
Sermon #3 — A Church that Involves You
Sermon #4 — A Church that Invests in You

SERMON SERIES — WORDS FROM THE WISE

Sermon #1 — Noah: One Person Can Make a Difference
Sermon #2 — Joseph: Don’t Give Up on Your Dream
Sermon #3 — Nehemiah: Big Problems Can Be Solved
Sermon #4 — Esther: God Has Placed You Where He Needs You
Sermon #5 — Hannah: Your Child’s Future is in Your Hands

HOLIDAY SERIES

SERMON SERIES — CHRISTMAS 101: BACK TO THE BASICS

Sermon #1 — Why Jesus Came
Sermon #2 — Who Jesus Is
Sermon #3 — What Jesus Offers

SERMON SERIES — THE GIFTS OF CHRISTMAS

Sermon #1 — The Gift of Strength
Sermon #2 — The Gift of Joy
Sermon #3 — The Gift of Christmas
Sermon #4 — The Gift of Hope

SERMON SERIES — THE SONGS OF CHRISTMAS

Sermon #1 — O Come, O Come Emmanuel
Sermon #2 — Joy to the World
Sermon #3 — Go Tell It on the Mountain
Sermon #4 — Mary, Did You Know?

HOLIDAY SINGLES

A New You for the New Year

Easter – Facts and Acts

How Does Easter Impact My Life?

What M.O.M. Stands For

Leaving A Legacy (Mother’s Day)

How to be the Perfect Woman (Mother’s Day)

How to Be a Godly Father

God’s Kind of Father

A God Who Develops Me (Father’s Day)

Thanksgiving Commands

Abounding in Thanksgiving

Who Deserves Our Thanks?

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What Effective Pastors Do With Their Time

evangelism, Pastoral Leadership, Personal Growth, prayer, Sermon, Uncategorized

What Effective Pastors Do With Their Time

Evangelism, Pastoral Leadership, Personal Growth
By Thom S. Rainer

Leadership gurus will tell you that a primary skill of an effective leader is the ability to manage time for maximum productivity. Out of curiosity, our research team asked over 200 pastors to provide us an hour-by-hour calendar of a typical 168-hour week for them. Keep in mind that 168 hours represent all the hours in a week, so their reports included such mundane items as sleeping and eating.

Impressed with the Effective Leaders

Our study included 101 pastors that we called effective leaders because their churches ranked in the top five percent in conversion growth in American churches. A comparison group of pastors of similar number were leading churches that did not have significant conversion growth.

Our researchers were impressed with the time management skills of the effective pastors. Perhaps the best way to show their skills is to compare their use of time with that of the leaders of the comparison churches.

Differences in Priorities

Without comment, let us highlight some of the most significant differences between the pastors of the effective churches versus the pastors of the comparison churches. You may be surprised at some of the findings.

  • Pastors of effective churches sleep slightly over six hours per day. Pastors of comparison churches sleep almost eight hours per day.
  • Pastors of effective churches spend twenty-two hours in sermon preparation each week versus four hours for pastors of comparison churches.
  • The effective church leaders spent ten hours each week in pastoral care compared to thirty-three hours for the comparison group pastors. Pastoral care included counseling, hospital visits, weddings, and funerals.
  • Effective church leaders average five hours per week in sharing the gospel with others. Most of the comparison church pastors entered “0” for their weekly time in personal evangelism.
  • Comparison church leaders spend eight hours a week – more than an hour each day – performing custodial duties at the church. The typical custodial duties included opening and closing the facilities, turning on and off the lights, and general cleaning of the building.
  • Leaders of effective churches average 22 hours a week in family activities. The comparison church leaders weren’t too far behind with 18 hours of family time each week.

Priorities and Balance

The time allocation of effective leaders seems to complement the way they describe their own leadership styles. In order to accomplish what they considered priority functions, they had to sacrifice in other areas. The leaders of effective churches spent over 40 hours per week with their families and in sermon preparation time. In order to fulfill these priorities, they obviously had to let some things go.

Thus the effective leaders cannot do many of the responsibilities often expected of them as pastors. They cannot make all the hospital visits. They cannot counsel everyone. And they cannot perform all of the custodial duties that may be expected of them. But as leaders they can see that those things get done.

Leaders of effective churches thus make certain that their family and work life is balanced. And they make certain they have time to be missional and all about the Great Commission.

They also give priority in time to prayer and to preparation in God’s Word for the sermons to follow.

They almost sound like they are following the pattern of the early church leaders: “But we will devote ourselves to prayer and to the preaching ministry” (Acts 6:4, HCSB).

Biblical. Missional. Evangelistic. And powerful preaching.

How are you spending your time?

 

This article was originally published at ThomRainer.com on July 1o, 2014. Thom S. Rainer serves as president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources. Among his greatest joys are his family: his wife Nellie Jo; three sons, Sam, Art, and Jess; and seven grandchildren. Dr. Rainer can be found on Twitter @ThomRainer and at facebook.com/Thom.S.Rainer.

One comment

One comment

    • Webster Wade
      July 19, 2014 at 10:51 am

      I am a bi vocational pastor. I work a secular job and pastor. My day begins at 4:30 with prayer and getting ready for work. 10 min for reading and off I go. Listening on the way to work with Bible on CD. This is 20 min. At Work 20 min. before work begins reading in New Testament. Prayer through day. Breaks and Lunch Study some more. This is about 50 min. Home by 5:00pm Eat with family at the table and spent time with kids. Then work at church til 10 and to bed. I average about 18 to 20 hours of study and visitation a week.

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The Importance of a Supportive Spouse in Ministry: Five Key Areas

Church Change, Pastoral Leadership, prayer, Uncategorized

The Importance of a Supportive Spouse in Ministry: Five Key Areas

Pastoral Leadership

By Thom Rainer

I am tempted to say that my ministry would be incomplete without my wife, Nellie Jo. It is more accurate, however, to say I likely wouldn’t have a ministry without her. She not only has been supportive; she has been a vital partner in my ministry.

Pastors and church staff members across the nation have shared with me the importance of their spouses in ministry. I was again reminded of this reality when I read a recent article in Harvard Business Review. The article was based on an incredibly impressive research project interviewing almost 4,000 business executives over a five-year period.

There were many parallels in this study and the anecdotal information I have heard from pastors and church staff members. To be clear, the HBR study looked at business executives, not those serving in churches. And they broadened the survey from “spouses” to “spouses and partners.” For those reasons, we can certainly expect divergence in the results compared to those serving churches vocationally.

Still, look at each of these key five areas and see for yourself if you can identify in your own ministry. The numbers may differ, but I think the sentiments will be similar.

  1. The importance of a spouse for emotional support (34% of the men and 29% of the women). A pastor recently shared with me his frustration with his church and his temptation to quit ministry. I asked him what has kept him going thus far. He told me: “The call of God and the support of my wife.” Many of us in ministry have similar stories.
  2. The importance of a spouse to accept career demands (16% of the men and 17% of the women). Someone who serves on a church staff is typically on call 24/7. Though pastors and church staff should do everything they can to give their families time, emergencies happen. Many needs are time sensitive. It takes a special spouse to handle that reality.
  3. The importance of a spouse to provide practical help (26% of the men and 13% of the women). In the HBR article, this practical help specifically addressed child raising and housekeeping and similar functions. I know a man whose wife serves as children’s minister in a church. It is very important for him to be home on weekends, particularly Sundays, because that’s his wife’s workday. He needs to be available to take care of the kids.
  4. Career advice (19% of the men and 13% of the women). I have looked to my wife every time I sensed God leading me to another place of ministry. She not only has been supportive, she has offered me wise and timely counsel. I was talking to a pastor just yesterday about a possible ministry change. He shared with me how important his wife is in providing counsel and advice.
  5. Willingness to relocate (10% of the men and 8% of the women). I feel confident that these percentages would be much higher among those in vocational ministry. The ministry is more often than not a very noble and mobile calling.

Keep in mind that the percentages noted in each of the five areas were for business executives. I believe, for the most part, the numbers would be much higher for those in ministry. And though the numbers are not mutually exclusive, there are hardly any leaders in businesses or churches who do not lean on their spouses greatly. Frankly, I can’t see how any pastor or any church staff person can make it in ministry without a supportive spouse.

How do you view these five areas? Are there some areas you would add to the five? Do you have a specific story of a supportive spouse in ministry? I would love to hear from you.

And by the way, Nellie Jo, thank you. I couldn’t make it in ministry or life without you.

This article was originally published at ThomRainer.com on March 10, 2014. Thom S. Rainer serves as president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources. Among his greatest joys are his family: his wife Nellie Jo; three sons, Sam, Art, and Jess; and seven grandchildren. Dr. Rainer can be found on Twitter @ThomRainer and at facebook.com/Thom.S.Rainer.

4 comments

4 comments

    • Josiah Themba Mdaka
      March 24, 2014 at 9:10 am

      This is what couples are for. I so pray that my wife can be that support pillar in my ministry as a pastor.

      Reply

    • Terry Moore
      March 24, 2014 at 10:04 am

      My wife and I have served several times on the mission field and I know without God`s protection and my wife`s support I would never have lasted long in ministry. Even today as we serve in our own community I still need the encouragement and love of my wife. I can always count on her for the truth in direction and support.I know that God loves me, because he put this wondeerful gift into my life. Thank You Lord!

      Reply

    • Allan RIver
      March 24, 2014 at 2:47 pm

      How wonderful to know that everything about my life had been planned by God. He knew I needed a strong woman, my wife, on my side seeing that I will be experiencing many challenges in my life. I never would have made it alone or with somebody else. It shouldn’t just be a spouse but He chose that specific one who will know how to support me when I’m down and out, when it seems as if God don’t respond to all my prayers. I can’t stop thanking God for the spouse He gave me to be on my side.

      Reply

    • Calvin H
      March 25, 2014 at 6:32 pm

      Barry-Excellent article. I wonder, however, how you harmonize what you say with Paul’s words in I Cor 7:32-35? (The bigger context begins with v. 7). Matt 19:12 also relates to this. It would seem that single ministry is God’s preference and married ministry is acceptable but second-best. We glorify romantic love in our culture, but Paul seemed to think that singleness was better for those in the Lord’s service. Some say that “that was only because Paul thought that Jesus was coming back in a few short years”. OK, but God apparently inspired those words and chose to have them preserved for us today. Thoughts? (I have been married for 35 years).

      Reply

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Nine Stupid Things I Did as a Pastor

Pastoral Leadership, Personal Growth, prayer, Uncategorized

Nine Stupid Things I Did as a Pastor

Pastoral Leadership, Personal Growth

3981364314_d4b30cb739_bBy Thom Rainer

If you want to read the tale of a pastor who really did some dumb things, keep reading.

I served as pastor of four churches. It was only by the grace of God and the graciousness of the congregations that I was called and allowed to stay at those churches. I absolutely love the members of those four congregations, and I will forever be grateful to them and for them.

Frankly, I’m not sure I would give myself a passing grade as a pastor. I messed up quite a bit. I would do several things differently today. And as a point of full disclosure, my list of nine is not close to being exhaustive.

1. I neglected my prayer life and time in the Word too often. It sounds absolutely insane as I write it, but I got too busy for God. As a consequence, I operated out of my own insufficient power too many times.
2. I neglected my family too often. Paul wrote these words to Pastor Timothy: “If anyone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of God’s church?” (1 Timothy 3:5, HCSB). Ouch. So many times I communicated through my actions to my family that they were not as important as other church members.
3. I let the crisis of the moment overwhelm me. In doing so I did not trust in God to see me through the situation. And I did not have a longer-term perspective to understand that difficulties are only for a season.
4. I perceived most of my critics as my adversaries. Some of my critics actually had constructive input. Others were going through their own struggles, and I was a convenient target. I took criticisms personally instead of responding pastorally.
5. I competed with other churches. Shame on me. Too often I wanted my church to have a greater attendance than other churches in the area. I should have been praying for and working with those other church leaders more.
6. I neglected praying with my staff. My prayer time with my church staff was haphazard at best. The one thing we needed to do the most, we were doing the least. I was a terrible leader on that front.
7. I often worried about what others thought about me. My sole concern should have been how Christ-like I was. Too often I sought the approval of others rather than the blessings of God.
8. I often yielded to unreasonable requests and demands. Instead of spending my time doing those things that really mattered, I gave in too often to the “squeaky wheel.” I sacrificed the great in order to do the good.
9. I gave up too often. Due to frustration, exhaustion or, more often, lack of faith, I gave up on challenges too quickly. I am convinced I missed out on many victories when they were just around the corner.

Those are but a few of the stupid things I did as a pastor. Most of you can breathe a sigh of relief that I never served as your pastor.

So why I am writing these self-critical comments at this stage of my life? I pray that some of you may see something in your own lives and leadership that you can correct before it’s too late. God is able. God is willing.

I look forward to your comments.

ThomRainer

 

This article was originally published at ThomRainer.com on May 4, 2015. Thom S. Rainer serves as president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources. Among his greatest joys are his family: his wife Nellie Jo; three sons, Sam, Art, and Jess; and seven grandchildren. Dr. Rainer can be found on Twitter @ThomRainer and at facebook.com/Thom.S.Rainer.

15 comments

15 comments

  • Sherene D Smith
    May 13, 2015 at 9:30 am

    Thank you for sharing. We have start a new church and it has been challenging.. thank you again for sharing your wisdom so we can stay focused.

    Reply

  • Erick
    May 13, 2015 at 9:39 am

    Thanks for being transparent. I believe it’s part of the reason people are leaving the church today is there is not enough transparency from the pulpit.

    Reply

  • Genaro Martinez, Jr.
    May 13, 2015 at 9:54 am

    Thank you for sharing this, all I can say is I have found myself there many times too. Only the grace of God and the love of the people we serve is what gets us through… God bless!

    Reply

  • David
    May 13, 2015 at 10:01 am

    I could add, “I spent too much time being mad at the ones who WEREN’T there and not enough time appreciating the ones who WERE there.”

    Reply

  • Anthony
    May 13, 2015 at 11:47 am

    I’ve been pastoring now for over 10 yrs. and I still haven’t perfected it. I have found out though, that the word of God, will always prevail over any situation. Just stay with the word. I have felt rejection, experienced slander, been taken to court, you name it; but God, and His word has always brought me through. And for that, I am encouraged.
    Thanks for the post.

    Reply

  • Lawrence Kumi
    May 13, 2015 at 11:54 am

    Thanks for sharing. It will be very helpful to some of us lay ministers. Most grateful.

    Reply

  • Musa Mitekaro
    May 13, 2015 at 12:07 pm

    Dear Pastor Rainer
    Greetings from Africa. I have been so much blessed by your articles. Sharing your experiences is a great ministry. I am a pastor and administrator here in Africa, you have touched my life. God bless you, your family and ministry

    Reply

  • Deborah Yinka
    May 13, 2015 at 2:59 pm

    Thanks for sharing your downsides with others. I really appreciate the fact someone else goes thru these challenges in serving the Lord Jesus. I think I get how to serve better. God bless you

    Reply

  • KOFI APPIANING
    May 13, 2015 at 4:22 pm

    Thanks for sharing. This is a great lesson for all ministers and Christian leaders

    Reply

  • Dexter
    May 13, 2015 at 7:44 pm

    Thank you for sharing some of the stuggles, and I believe it will help somebody.

    Reply

  • Jean Jackson Luma
    May 13, 2015 at 9:40 pm

    Dear Pastor Rainer
    Greetings From Haitian Community ( Norwood Church of God in Massachusetts) .

    Thanks so much for sharing your experiences with us ,by today I will apply them in my ministry .

    May God bless you and your family

    Bishop Jean J Luma

    Reply

  • Dave Stevenson
    May 14, 2015 at 5:42 am

    Thanks, when I hear or see someone take a stand for being wrong, I know they are on their way to greatness. Show us oh Lord who we are and how to grow in you.

    Reply

  • Frank esilaba
    May 14, 2015 at 10:10 am

    Dear Pastor
    Thanks for sharing. This is a great lesson for all ministers and Christian leaders and especially me. I will use this in my service for Christ our Lord.

    God bless you, your family and Ministry,

    Bishop Frank Esilaba

    Reply

  • Ps Ray Terborg
    May 15, 2015 at 5:05 am

    Thank you pastor for sharing with us your experiences this counts for Every ps bishops this is an eye opener for every leader in THE churches today,
    Thank you

    Reply

  • Pst. Edith Wekesa
    May 18, 2015 at 2:22 am

    Thank you pastor greetings from Kenya and for sharing about yourself. It is great that one can admit their faults. it gives me strength to know that the struggles are for all of us, therefore we need to uplift each other as ministers of the word of God all the earth. Its encouraging to share and enable others avoid same mistakes.

    Reply

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