By Thom Rainer
If you want to read the tale of a pastor who really did some dumb things, keep reading.
I served as pastor of four churches. It was only by the grace of God and the graciousness of the congregations that I was called and allowed to stay at those churches. I absolutely love the members of those four congregations, and I will forever be grateful to them and for them.
Frankly, I’m not sure I would give myself a passing grade as a pastor. I messed up quite a bit. I would do several things differently today. And as a point of full disclosure, my list of nine is not close to being exhaustive.
1. I neglected my prayer life and time in the Word too often. It sounds absolutely insane as I write it, but I got too busy for God. As a consequence, I operated out of my own insufficient power too many times.
2. I neglected my family too often. Paul wrote these words to Pastor Timothy: “If anyone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he take care of God’s church?” (1 Timothy 3:5, HCSB). Ouch. So many times I communicated through my actions to my family that they were not as important as other church members.
3. I let the crisis of the moment overwhelm me. In doing so I did not trust in God to see me through the situation. And I did not have a longer-term perspective to understand that difficulties are only for a season.
4. I perceived most of my critics as my adversaries. Some of my critics actually had constructive input. Others were going through their own struggles, and I was a convenient target. I took criticisms personally instead of responding pastorally.
5. I competed with other churches. Shame on me. Too often I wanted my church to have a greater attendance than other churches in the area. I should have been praying for and working with those other church leaders more.
6. I neglected praying with my staff. My prayer time with my church staff was haphazard at best. The one thing we needed to do the most, we were doing the least. I was a terrible leader on that front.
7. I often worried about what others thought about me. My sole concern should have been how Christ-like I was. Too often I sought the approval of others rather than the blessings of God.
8. I often yielded to unreasonable requests and demands. Instead of spending my time doing those things that really mattered, I gave in too often to the “squeaky wheel.” I sacrificed the great in order to do the good.
9. I gave up too often. Due to frustration, exhaustion or, more often, lack of faith, I gave up on challenges too quickly. I am convinced I missed out on many victories when they were just around the corner.
Those are but a few of the stupid things I did as a pastor. Most of you can breathe a sigh of relief that I never served as your pastor.
So why I am writing these self-critical comments at this stage of my life? I pray that some of you may see something in your own lives and leadership that you can correct before it’s too late. God is able. God is willing.
I look forward to your comments.

This article was originally published at ThomRainer.com on May 4, 2015. Thom S. Rainer serves as president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources. Among his greatest joys are his family: his wife Nellie Jo; three sons, Sam, Art, and Jess; and seven grandchildren. Dr. Rainer can be found on Twitter @ThomRainer and at facebook.com/Thom.S.Rainer.
Sure would like to have the written copy of this as well. The videos are nice to watch, but nothing beats having it in “His written word”.
I can with the tongues of angels but have not love I am a resounding symbol. Please tell me in what way are you extending the good news of Jesus’ love to gay people? Your hate is overpowering!
Hate? The video was filled with the Gospel and Grace of God. What specifically are you referring to?
No hate Dale. Barry shows God’s love through Jesus Christ in this video. Christ died so we can be forgiven and know God’s love. Christ did not die so we can continue in filthy acts of sin.
Dale, there’s really no hate in the video. But the truth has to be spoken. Let me ask you a question. Do you have any friends of yours or people you know who are alcoholics and are drinking themselves to pieces? Now imagine yourself using all the tactful kind words you can think of to convey a message to them that what they are doing is wrong. Would they be justified to say that you are hateful? The very same thing applies to gay people. They are human beings of value no doubt at all, but if they choose to indulge their sinful tendency of homosexuality, they must be told out of love that they are wrong. Hoodwinking them that their sexual tendency is ok is the real hatred, not the other way round.
i like it well said
It’s amazing that people view the truth as hate. I have friends who are gay and I love them but the truth is the truth and The grace and the gospel of Jesus Christ is filled with nothing but love!
the devil has been deceiving people from begining and he still doing it now some sin is so simple that a baby can tell the different god said multiple male and female .
I am blessed by this message. I hope the leaders who are condoning homosexuality can see and understand how they have condemned millions to eternal death by giving in to this diabolic act.
The truth had been said. We have heard it, we have seen it; No man can pretend they have never. Let him that have ears hear what the spirit of the God is saying.
Thanks Bro Barry.